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Take Me As I Am

By Angeleque Ford


Jay Black is one of 90.5's WKBL Detroit's most popular late night radio jockey's. And he's used to taking some interesting and bizarre calls. So it's not surprising when Jay's personal life becomes the topic after seeing his ex-boyfriend, Darrius Stone is back in town. When a caller suggests Jay get over his broken heart by starting on a new one, Darrius sees it as the perfect opportunity and phones in with a propositiona a one night stand.

But when he finds out who the caller was, he's furious and informs Darrius sex wasn't the problem between them acceptance was. And while he won't give him another chance to break his heart, he will agree to one last fuck. Can Jay accept Darrius' new life? And will Darrius' be able to accept Jay's choices? Or will the past get in the way of their future together?

Elements: M/M, African-American



What's easier? Falling in love or falling out of it?" Black leaned forward so he would be clearly heard across the airwaves. "For me, falling in love is the easy part. And it's not necessarily the actual process of falling out of love that's hard.

"Or even ending things, which of course depends on the situation. But, being able to accept the relationship is over and moving on, that's where the pain comes in. With the realization and acceptance that the person you thought you would be spending the rest of your life with isn't who you thought they were, and won't be sharing your bed with you or holding you during those difficult, restless nights."

He paused, took a breath followed by a low chuckle, then cleared his throat.
"Sorry, folks, didn't mean to get so heavy right there, but I got lost for a moment. Since we're not here just to talk but hopefully to enlighten as well as entertain, we're going to play a few songs before we get into the calls." The radio show producer, Diannah Washburn, typed in the next song queued to play so Black could set it up. "This next piece is an old-school joint. It's become a sorta nostalgic favorite as well as one of the new oldies from my generation. Hip-hop's version of a love or break up song. This is 'Song Cry' by Jay-Z."

The song played, then another, followed by a few commercials, then the intro jingle, and Pandora Robinson's sexy voice floated out over the airwaves.
Come on. Get in. It's worth the ride. Come...In Bed with Black...You know you want to.

"Don't you absolutely love our opening?" his co-host Pandora said.

The room broke into laughter at her question. It was a running joke. Pandora got paid every time the promo played.

"So what's with the heavy topic, Black?" his other co-host, Synda, asked. "Is it still Darrius? And I hate to sound insensitive, but you have to get past this, Black."

"I ran into him today." He paused and an audible sigh could be heard over the radio waves. "I thought I had gotten over it. But when you see the person who broke your heart because he was, what...scared? Couldn't accept me? I think that's bull shish. We were in a relationship for four years, living together for the last one. Was it my gym shoes by the door, my socks on the floor? I'm not a slob." He groaned. "I didn't mean to get into this, everyone. But seeing him threw me. And I mean, I'm not trying to be a punk, but I loved him. I wanted to spend my life with him."

"Get married, have some babies," Pandora chimed in.

"Maybe. Not exactly, given I'm gay. However, I've made no secret about wanting a family, a child, a commitment. But the point is he lied. He said he loved me. But what I don't understand is how you can be in love with someone and cheat on them. In our bed. If he told me he wanted a threesome, I would have considered it."

"Whoa. Wait a minute," Pandora interrupted. "You didn't tell us that particular piece of news."

"What was the point?" He chuckled. "And we're getting off the point. It's not about me and Darrius. It's about love in general. So, ladies and gentleman, call in with your love dedications, confessions, stories. Got something to get off your chest? Call 1-Get-In-W-BLCK."

"How 'bout we spin something. This is Mariah Carey's 'Don't Forget About Us,'" Synda interjected. "Lighten up this heaviness."

"And you picked that song?" Pandora laughed. "It's the quintessential breakup song. A perfect 'you screwed up big time when you left me for her,' well, him, song."

"He did not leave me for another guy. We broke up because I couldn't trust him to be faithful and true to us or what we were building together anymore." He sighed. "And I'm getting way too personal. Just play the damn—sorry, dang song."

The song's opening melodies drifted over the airwaves. Black gave the signal for their mics to be cut while the music played to avoid another incident like last time. Pandora's microphone had been left open and some inappropriate words got out over the air, resulting in a fine and suspension for her.

"We are not turning this into Black's lovelorn and lack of a love life show."

"Of course not," Pandora agreed. "'Cause while your name may be on the show and you get top billing, we are a part of this, too. Nobody wants to hear about your romantic life or lack thereof."

"Oh, and people want to hear about your freakalicious lifestyle," Synda threw in.
"I can't help it if I like and enjoy sex. There's nothing wrong with it," Pandora informed her. "And it's not like everyone wants to be celibate like you."

"Aight, ladies, can the crap. We have a show to get through. And I don't know what's going on between you two, but let's keep it off the air, shall we?" Black advised, his tone cautious but strong. The underlying meaning behind his words came through.

The crew gave the signal, they were back on the air, and mics opened.

Heeding his words, Pandora laughed. "If y'all could only see or hear what happens during those music and commercial breaks."

"I think we're lucky they can't, 'cause you ladies are wild. And since I'm getting a signal that the phone lines are full, I say we take a call. Line Four, please."

"Hello, caller. You're In Bed with Black. Grab a pillow and get on in. Tell us, what's your fantasy?" Pandora said, keeping her voice airy and breathy.

"You really need a new line to say," Black interjected. "Go 'head, caller."

"This is Renee. Are you sure you're gay, Black?"

"Positive, sweetheart."


"Is there something I can help you with?"

"Not now." She hung up.

The control booth laughed.

"Okay. Before we go to the next caller, Diannah, ladies, save yourselves the trouble. You can't turn him," Pandora said.

"And I know he sounds all cute and cuddly right now and you want to ease his pain, but you ain't his type," Synda added.

"Um, yeah. You're missing a key piece of anatomy," Diannah answered from the booth.

"Yeah, a penis." Pandora laughed.

"Okay. Back to the callers, before I lose any more control of this show."

"Who said you were in control?" Synda quipped.

"Anyway, as I was going to say, it wouldn't hurt you to get out there and start dating again," Pandora said.

"Next caller, Diannah," Black said, ignoring them.

"Why is that so out of the realm of possibility?" Synda asked. "All you do is work, promo ops, and go home. You make excuses when we ask you out." Turning toward Pandora, she added, "I think this is a great idea."

He ran a hand over his bald head, saying nothing.

"Um, this is a radio talk show program. We need words," Pandora said.

"No. Next caller, Diannah."

"Why don't you listen to the ladies? My grandma said the only way to get over a broken heart is to start on a new one. Sure, it may just be about sex at first, but it could grow into something more."

"Thanks, caller. Next."

"Hi. My name is Ann." The caller paused. "What about a dating contest? People could write in and say why they want to go out with him."

"Hmm. Interesting," Synda said. "Keep going, caller."

"I guess it would have to be open to men only, considering his lifestyle and orientation. The potential date could fill out a profile form, submit a picture and videotaped message."

"How would we weed out the crazies?" Black asked. "What am I saying? I'm not doing this."

"That sounded like a yes." Synda laughed.


"What about a maybe?" Ann, the caller, asked. "It's not like it'll hurt. They'll weed out the crazies and you can get a committee of your most trusted friends to pick the top ten. Then let your listeners narrow it down to the top five or top three."
"He'll think about it," the program director, Ramona Tracey, interjected. "Ann, stay on the line and we can discuss this more. Since this is your idea, we'd like you in on the setup."

"Okay. Fine. It looks like I have no choice. How about we take another caller?"

"I think it should be open to women, too," the caller said.

Black laughed. "Thanks, sweetie. But I like me as I am. I'm not looking for a woman. I prefer my sex to be with a man. Next caller, Diannah."

"How about women strictly for friendship purposes? You know someone to shop with, hang with?"

"No thanks. Been there, done that, bought the T-shirt. It never goes well. Some don't think that I am truly gay and want to change me. Besides, I have enough women in my life as friends and matchmakers. Plus, that's a stereotype, not all homosexual men like to shop."

"Before this gets too out of hand, we're going to play some music," Pandora said.
Diannah segued into the next song rotation. And when they came back from the commercial break, Pandora's opening played again.

"We only have time to take a few more calls, so make your questions count," Black said.

They took two more callers who wanted to sign up to win a date with Jay Black. Both were informed details would be available on their Web site within the next month.

"Time for one last call," Black said. "Go ahead, caller. You have a question or comment?"

"I have an alternative to this get-a-date thing," the caller said in a rich, smooth voice. "How about a one-night stand? Jay and I meet, on me, at a specified time and place and have at it?"

"Do I know you, caller? Your voice sounds familiar." Black paused for a second. "Plus, there aren't many people who call me Jay. The majority of the show's fans call me Black."

"No. I just have one of those voices." The caller laughed, and the rough-sounding chuckle floated through the room and sounded over the airwaves. "So, what about it? I'm disease free, single, and good-looking, if I do say so myself."

"Why?" Pandora jumped in.

"'Cause my Granny said the same thing as the other caller. Sometimes the best, only way to get over a broken heart, or a bad breakup, is with a good, hot round of sweaty, jungle-gym sex."

"Why you?" Synda wanted to know.

"Because I know what's it like to have your heart broken and not be able to just get over it. I also know that Jay's ex sounds like a real prick. Plus I'm a loyal listener. And if those reasons aren't good enough," the caller said, "I've seen Jay out and about within the community, and I think he's sexy. And let's just say...let's just say my body has quite the reaction to his."

"So this is just about sex?" Pandora spoke, leaning closer to the microphone, "Interesting. Tell us about yourself."

"Hold up." Black cut in. "We are not considering this. I am not doing this. Thanks for the compliment and all. But the answer is no." He ran a hand over his head. "Everyone says that they're disease free. And even though we would use a condom, that's not the point, the answer is no." Turning to the ladies in the booth with him, he asked, "Do you realize how insane this sounds? This man, though he has a sexy phone voice, could be a psychotic killer."

"The phone lines are blazing," Diannah interjected.

"That may be so, but we go off the air in half an hour. And this is the last caller, people."

"How about we meet, then? A neutral location? And you can talk to me and get to know me, check me out?"

"Isn't that against the rules of a booty call?" Pandora asked.

"There are booty call rules?" Synda frowned. "Why would there be rules?"

Pandora sighed. "I don't have time to explain this to you." She looked at Black. "Caller. Stay on the line, we'll work something out." Motioning to Diannah, she said, "Take us out with 'My Place' by Nelly."

"Sounds like somebody has a booty call of her own." Diannah laughed.

"Man or woman?" Ramona threw out.

"First of all, that's none of your business. Second, it's not a booty call since we've already established a relationship. It's one of my spares. Mamí needs to work off some stress tonight. Third, just play the dang song, Diannah."

"I'm still trying to get over the fact that there are rules to a booty call." Synda sighed.

"That's it for another show," Black said, his voice gruff and low. "This is not how I pictured this show going. I hope you got something out of it, even if it was just a laugh or two. And if we made you laugh, it was worth it. Laughter helps us get through the rough patches. Up next we have 90.5 WKBL's fabulous, award-winning morning team, Cuppa Caffeine Crew."